Friday, March 26, 2010

American History ... Joe Biden Style


On September 31st, 1929 - the first day of spring and the day after Christmas, the stock market crashed in the morning just as the evening news with Katie Couric came on. President Roosevelt called a meeting of the Joint Chiefs, and they rolled one.

President Roosevelt called CNN on his cell phone and made a statement. He said not to worry, the economy was fine and the government would take care of everything. To show confidence in the system, he went water skiing behind a U-boat on Lake Pontchartrain.

When Poland invaded Mongolia, it was so hot in Siberia that you could cook kielbasa on the sidewalk in Moscow. That is the preferred method of cooking kielbasa to this day.

But the Chinese launched Sputnik, and everyone panicked. The US bought up all the land east of China and flooded it so no one else could use it. The Corps of Engineers built a moat around Hawaii so Barack Obama could vacation there.

All along, Republican controlled banks loaned money to people with no legs to stand on, and their pants had no pockets to hold the money they needed to make their mortgage payments. And that's how the deficit was created.